Star Wars Movies Are Secretly Forbidden From Showing These Five Objects

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away… there was no paper. There were droids, spaceships with hyperdrives and moon-sized space stations equipped with planet destroying lasers, but no paper. Not even parchment.

If someone asked you to define the “Star Wars” aesthetic, how would you respond? The movies, live-action shows, and animated series all possess a specific look and feel, but can you boil it down to a sentence or two? Perhaps you could say it’s a mixture of junk and sleek, but that’s too general. There’s something essential missing. And that essential element may be an ineffable quality. Maybe you just know “Star Wars” when you see it, and that’s that!

Or maybe you could describe that singular aesthetic by what “Star Wars” doesn’t have.

That’s in part how “Andor” creator Tony Gilroy (who gives an enticing glimpse into the series’ second season in the latest issue of Empire) has engaged with the universe since completing “Rogue One: A Star Wars Story” for Lucasfilm and director Gareth Edwards. When he took on the film about the rebel’s heisting of the original Death Star’s plans, he found that the notes he received from the gatekeepers at Lucasfilm were generally about objects that did not exist in the ongoing saga.

As Gilroy told Le Monde in 2022, “I remember we were shooting a scene and someone was cleaning a knife. You can’t have a knife, there are no knives in Star Wars, no wheels, no paper.” Who’s issuing these directives? “There’s a guy, Pablo Hidalgo, who says what’s allowable,” Gilroy explained. “He has a very difficult job because he has to remember everything [that ever happened in the universe].”

So, what objects do we know for certain are verboten in “Star Wars?” Here’s what’s on the do-not-depict list according to available reporting (with a few possible exceptions).

There must be restrooms in the “Star Wars” universe, but if you happen to make use of one do not expect to straighten up your appearance in the mirror before rejoining the outside world. According to Gilroy, you’ll have to catch your reflection on something else, or simply learn from an early age how to groom yourself without one.

If you’re looking for an exception, there is that terrific scene in “Star Wars: Episode VIII — The Last Jedi,” where Rey (Daisy Ridley) sees infinite reflections of herself in the midst of her Jedi training. It’s an especially trippy sequence for the rather traditional “Star Wars,” so you have to wonder if there was some discussion as to the kosherness of these naturally appearing mirrors. Since they weren’t practically hung, we’ll say that they don’t break the “Star Wars” prohibition of mirrors.

In a series perpetually (tiresomely at this point) hung up on birthright, it’s surprising that paper isn’t allowed because how else are you going to keep track of birth certificates and the like? We know from one of the very first scenes in “Star Wars: Episode IV — A New Hope” that messages can be imparted via holograms, so maybe everyone’s walking around with holo-certificates and licenses. We don’t see much of them, and I’m not necessarily complaining about the lack of minutiae in this regard. Perhaps we can just assume that there’s stuff written down somewhere, and Lucasfilm simply doesn’t care to break its narrative stride to hold on a close-up of an edict or passport. Or not! One place where “Star Wars” could’ve easily wedged in some paperwork was during Han Solo’s attempt to bypass security to board a transport in “Solo: A Star Wars Story.” Instead, he’s able to get by on his own recognizance and a bribe — and we know there’s no paper money in “Star Wars.” You’re welcome, trees of the galaxy.

In a galaxy stuffed with spaceships and hovering speeders, why would anyone have use for a wheel? The most primitive vehicles we see (e.g. the Jawas’ sandcrawler) have tank treads, which make a lot more sense in the desert than wheels (though the spice harvesters in David Lynch’s “Dune” come equipped with them).

If you’re looking for a wheel rule breaker in the “Star War” universe, you need look no further than D-0 in “Star Wars: Episode IX — The Rise of Skywalker” (though I understand if you’re not eager to dig back into that trash compactor of a motion picture). This is the old, beat-up droid discovered by BB-8, and he has, by his own declaration, a “squeaky wheel.” Why this nothing of a character was deemed vital enough to violate the wheel prohibition is a mystery. If you’re about to swing in here to indignantly claim that R2-D2 has wheels, I’m sorry, but he has tracks under his feet. D-0 is, to the best of my knowledge, the only wheeled anything in the “Star Wars” galaxy.

There’s a whole lotta Mandela Effect going on with knives in “Star Wars.” Obviously, Boba Fett has knives, right? He doesn’t. What about the beeping Swiss Army knife that is R2-D2? Nope. Whenever there are dining scenes in “Star Wars” (and there aren’t many), you won’t see a single knife being used. There are simply other ways to cut objects in these movies and shows, and I think a minor flourish like this goes a long way toward making “Star Wars” feel otherworldly. If someone were to whip out a knife in, say, “The Mandalorian,” it would be jarring.

Ever notice that you’ve never seen a door swing open in “Star Wars?” That’s because, according to a 2023 article by The Hollywood Reporter, they all slide one way or another (left to right, up and down, or even diagonally). One person who might loathe this bit of stylistic gatekeeping is Harrison Ford, whose leg was crushed by a hydraulic door while shooting “Star Wars: Episode VII — The Force Awakens” (in the resulting lawsuit, which Ford won, the door was described as a “blunt guillotine”). Even though Lucasfilm had to shell out $2 million to compensate Mr. Ford for the painful mishap, “Star Wars” doors still be slidin’!