The idea for Kimberly Newton’s first children’s book came about when a stranger at a book festival told her to “write the story you needed as a child.”
“That invitation struck me in a very emotional way that I didn’t expect,” said Newton, a Harrisonburg resident and former theater director. “I thought, oh gosh, what book did I need that I didn’t have? And, of course, my thoughts went to Katie.”
When Newton was four years old, her mother told her she was going to have a new baby sister. Her mother named the unborn baby Katie, and Newton happily began to prepare for her younger sister’s arrival.
However, the baby was stillborn, and Newton struggled to come to terms with the fact that her dreams of a younger sister wouldn’t come true.
“Unfortunately, like so many families, we found ourselves grieving the loss of a baby that we expected to be able to hold and play with,” Newton said. “And then we couldn’t.”
Newton was an avid reader and artist, but she said there were no children’s books she knew of at the time that dealt with infant loss.
“It was, I think, taboo to talk about infant loss,” Newton said. “There were very few resources and organizations for families facing that kind of loss and grief.”
Now, Newton is a mother with two children of her own and has recently self-published her first book, titled “Goodbye Sister.”
The autobiographical book features illustrations drawn in a whimsical fantasy style by Idaho-based illustrator Ethan Roffler. It follows 4-year-old Kimi, based on Newton, as she deals with the death of the baby sister she was supposed to have.
The book deals with Newton’s early childhood experience, but the catalyst for it was another tragic loss — her adopted younger brother was killed in a homicide in Staunton in 2020. The family moved to Harrisonburg, and Newton began thinking again about Katie, the sister she had lost. Then, she began writing.
The book went through several drafts. It was originally written in first-person but then was changed to a third-person perspective. Newton began looking for an illustrator who would work with a self-published author, eventually finding Ethan Roffler.
Multiple publishers rejected Newton’s book at first. Eventually, she decided to self-publish it, a process she described as complex and expensive.
“In the eyes of a publisher, it was for a very niche audience,” Newton said. “It took me just over two years from the time I decided to self-publish to actually holding the book in my hands.”
She also said it was difficult to edit the book due to the emotional nature of the content.
“Whenever you’re writing a story about your own life, it can be tough to get criticism, even from well-meaning people you love,” Newton said.
In 2022, her hard work paid off when she was finally able to publish the book. It has since gained popularity among clinicians who work with grieving children.
“Early in the writing process, I shared the manuscript with psychologists and counselors, professional counselors who work with children who are grieving this type of loss, in order to get their feedback about the story,” Newton said. “From the onset, I wanted it to be something that clinicians could use in a setting like a hospital or therapy practice.”
On more than one occasion, Newton’s book has been displayed at conferences dealing with child psychology and grief counseling — a fact she is proud of.
“That really filled me with gratitude for knowing that Ethan and I, and many other people who contributed to the book, crafted a story that is so needed,” Newton said.
This was Newton’s first book, but she says it won’t be her last. She plans to write more children’s books about helping children deal with their emotions, featuring a character she created while writing “Goodbye Sister” named Winslow. Winslow is one of the creatures in the “garden” Roffler illustrated for the book — where baby Katie was buried, which plays a significant role in the story.
“In the eyes of my, or her, 4-year-old mind, her cemetery was a garden. It was a special place where we could go and remember her,” Newton said. “And so, the garden in ‘Goodbye Sister’ starts to take on its own character because of the world that Ethan has illustrated. The garden becomes an extension of Kimi’s imagination and her playfulness, which are ultimately things children use to build resiliency through grief.”
Newton said her book has been well received, even by some people outside the United States.
“Thanks to the Internet and global distribution, Katie’s footprints have found their way out into the world,” Newton said.
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